Have you heard the joke about the kid who comes home from college, and says to his parents, “its remarkable how much YOU have learned in four years.” It’s funny in that most of us see the wonderful irony that the kid who leaves home after High School thinking that his parents know nothing about the world, comes back realizing that actually, they actually are decently wise.
It reminds me of what my father told me at 17 years old, “You should move out now while you still know everything!” Certainly I was that kid when I left home, and also was that young man when I realized that my parents have lots of good life wisdom, and are generous to share it with me.
Early in my rabbinic career, I was having trouble balancing work with other things that were really important to me. This is not an uncommon problem for many of us, and balance is something that is not figured out and done, but rather requires constant attention and correction. In this particular case, I was trying to figure out how to make sure that I was exercising (and staying healthy) while balancing a 70 hour work week. My father gave me some really good advice. “Calendar it,” he said. “Place it on your daily schedule and treat it with the same respect that you would an important meeting. If you don’t, other things (less important things than my health) will always find a way to push their way in.”
Of course, he was right.
I find that I apply his advice to other things that are important to me as well: prayer, giving of my time, devoted blocks of time to my most important relationships. I am still far from perfect when it comes to balance, but by calendaring my priorities they are able to happen more times than not.
In my daily interactions with congregants at Temple Emanu-El, I do my best to relay my father’s advice. When congregants tell me that they really want to do more with TE, but they can’t seem to find the time, I acknowledge that life is busy, and that if they would just place it on their calendar, the chances of it happening will go up exponentially.
This applies to coming to Friday night services (every Friday at 7:30pm), or Shabbat morning Torah study (every Saturday at 9am), connecting socially with other Jews, doing Adult Education, supporting Israel, or volunteering through TE to make the world a better place (tikkun olam).
Your synagogue has so many ways for you to connect Jewishly, delve spiritually, work on friendships, learn, and give back.
Think about what you want to do, and try putting it on your calendar. I bet it works.
By the way, if you need help figuring out the specifics, reach out to me directly, I’ll be glad to help.
From strength to strength,
Shabbat shalom.